So woman, you want my ring. The ring which gives power. Do you want it to be able to fight me? To take what‘s rightfully yours?
I understand this now. I have used it so many times against you. I feel and understand your anger. And I‘m deeply sorry.
But why should I believe you that you will not take much more, once you are wearing the ring? Do you really believe that you will be able to use its power for good? When so many before, including some sisters of yours, have tried and failed?
No, today i know for sure: the ring cannot be used for good. It‘s impossible. I must know. I have been wearing it for a large part of my life. It corrupts and slowly poisons the heart. The heart of men and women likewise. It makes you do things you will regret.
And this is why I will not give it to you today.
But I promise you here and now: I will take it off my finger on the very day you don’t feel the desire to use it anymore. On the day I can feel that the only reason why you want to take it from me, is to relieve me from the burden of carrying it.
Until then I will carry it. I will carry it for us. Trying as good as I can to resist its power. You must work hard and fast, as the ring is heavy on my heart. It‘s getting heavier by the day. Work fast.
I‘m sure the day will come soon when I can give it to you. When I can slip it on your finger.
And in this moment, the ring will lose its dark power.
You will wear it as a memory. It will look beautiful on your hand.
Added 19.07.24:
And a cool visual comment from a reader I want to share with you:
Added 20.07.24:
This illustration (and the other critical comments I received with it) inspired me to think (quite) a bit further on this „story“ (or whatever it is) I wrote.
I think the image depicts the situation around 70 years ago. When „the ring“ was in the exclusive possession of men. It is true that at this point in time they had the chance to just stop to use it. As we all know, we missed this opportunity. But today the situation is different: women, tired of being victims, want the ring. And, at least to some extent, they are already in the possession of a part of it.
So why not just cut the ring in two halves (of exactly the same size!) and give women one of them? While I also think that this is a good (and necessary) thing to do, I’m quite sure that this is not enough. And my story is therefore not about sharing the ring but about „making it undone“. It is not enough to distribute power. Power itself must be destroyed.
Why? Because an equilibrium of power can also be a dynamic equilibrium. Look at the border between Russia and Ukraine: both countries are about equally strong, none of them makes significant progress on the front. But still a thousand young men are sent into death every day.
Now to destroy power is a much more ambitious goal than the mere distribution. And, I believe, some kind of protocol is required to achieve it:
- The party which abused the power must realize that there was abuse. This can be achieved with the help of the victim.
- The abuse must stop.
- The abuser must understand how the abuse could happen. What exact sequence of events lead to the abusive actions. He must therefore understand himself and his history. The reward for this process (and what incentivizes the abuser to initiate it) is forgiveness: he will be, by being able to understand himself and the reasons for his actions (for instance the fears behind them), able to forgive himself. I think this step is essential, as otherwise the feeling of guilt of the abuser will make the following steps impossible.
- Now, the abuser and the victim must talk. The victim too must understand what happened.
- At some point in time the anger of the victim must be transformed into understanding. The victim must forgive the abuser.
- Then only power will be not required anymore
So my story describes a future man (which has arrived at step 3-4) and not the present.
But in the illustration lies another question: is the desire for power a „male only“ thing (in the sense that the women's desire for it is only a reaction to the actions of men)? Possibly. I have no ideas to answer this question right now.
And something else: I could not resist the temptation to make use of the strong symbol of the wedding in the end. But of course the wedding ring is also a symbol of ownership and in my story only the woman gets to wear it („as a memory“ but still).
But it could be interpreted in the following way: If we manage one day to „destroy the ring“, our long shared history will remain. And I think it should not be deleted, because this would also mean the destruction of all our culture. And what else do we have?
And hopefully this long history (which is shaped by abuse) could still be useful: as material for playing. Maybe the ring could therefore be transformed like this into - among other things - a very very sophisticated love toy?
But this will be definitely my last own comment to one of my texts. I don't want to have the last word here. I will, from today, leave the space below my texts exclusively for my reader's feedback (and will save my thoughts for another post).
Image on top: Shutterstock, GaleanoStock
Follow me on X to get informed about new content on this blog.
